How to Overcome the Fear of Judgement That Holds Most People Back

Hello guys I am Vicky Murgatroyd from Life Empowerment Project and I’m super excited to be delivering you this week’s blog, which is all about how to overcome that fear of judgement that holds most people back.

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Now I went to hop on and record this blog kind of off the cuff for you guys because I’ve spoken to loads of women over the last couple of weeks while we get ready to launch the next round of the Awakened Entrepreneur and the kind of recurring theme throughout a lot of these women is the fear of judgement.

The fear of stepping out, being seen and having people either validate the fact that you already agree with, that you think you’re not good enough and have them criticise you in ways that you feel you won’t be able to handle that will somehow impact on you, just because they have something to say about you.

I really wanted to address this because

a) I’ve been there and it’s exactly where I came from and it’s a huge thing that holds people back

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b) It is very easy to overcome and there are some certain shifts that you are going to make that I’m going to show you in this blog, 2 particular pillars that are just going to turn it completely on its head.

So the first kind of pillar when it comes to this is that you need to validate yourself. We are so good at looking external to ourselves for those things that we want to feel. Now, not only is that completely unreliable to require it from other sources, from external sources, it’s also very unpredictable and it leaves you on very shaky ground because you have nothing to fall back on, no trust within yourself.

So literally self-validation is a case of affirming to yourself what you believe about yourself, really getting clear on who you are, what you bring to the table, your skill set, your connection. All those amazing things that are in existence, but we spend so much time spinning things around in our head and telling ourselves all kinds of bullshit stories, that it never really connects us to that deeper power we have.

Now through the process of self-validation you’re really going to build a lot of certainty and that’s all grounded in self-love. When you’re giving yourself that validation, that affirmation, those incantations to really getting your biochemistry changing and move out of those old habits and patterns, then all of your behaviour starts to change.

All of it.

You don’t care what other people think because you know yourself. You’re set, you’re certain, all that’s all that matters. Yeah, you’re going to get compliments, yeah you can get potential criticisms, but you’ve got that steady, certain base within yourself. And as I’ve said in other videos, you take yourself everywhere you go, so you got to get comfortable with you, that’s a primary point. So yeah, self-validation is a complete game changer.

So some practical tips to apply. Literally give yourself 5 minutes in the morning, 5 minutes in the evening and sit. We do this as part of the morning ritual without clients, but part of it is you have your affirming phrases. So anything you perceive to be a weakness of yours. Say for instance for me, I was always the shy kid, I was always very quiet and that was always told to me, so when I suddenly had to speak and even be on camera and speak on stage and things like that, it was very shaky ground for me, I was very nervous. So one of the things that I would affirm to myself is that I am a great speaker, that I could speak comfortably and with anybody. Now when you start all this stuff enough and you really connect with it on an emotional level, that changes who you are. Changes your beliefs, it changes your core identity and that is a complete game changer.

So 5 minutes in the morning, 5 minutes in the evening, affirming to yourself everything you bring to the table, everything that you are, everything that you have and just connecting with that self-love completely. All it takes is that 5 minutes, morning and evening. It’s going to be weird at first and that happens because it feels strange as you build it, but I promise you, as I say, total game changer.

Pillar number 2 is connecting with something higher than yourself. So whether that be god for you, whether that be the universe, whether that be the kind of one consciousness, whatever it is, there is undeniable that there is something greater than us at work. Undeniable. So to connect with that gives you certainty again and as you might notice, that is kind of the theme running throughout today.

Because when you have that certainty, judgement doesn’t matter, and yes you are going to get judgement. But by connecting with a high power, knowing where you come from through the self-validation, it puts you in a state of certainty and that leaves you unshakable. Yes, thing will get to you, but they’re not going to knock you off your path anymore because you have that steady base within yourself and that is invaluable.

So connecting with something higher. It can even be your vision to impact the world, something that is larger than you. For me, one of my contribution thing is, as you know, (if you’ve been following for a while, and if you don’t then here you go) is that I want to give as much as possible to charities that look after cancer in a natural way.

Not in the old medicinal ways, that aren’t working anyway, but that look at alternatives and that actually get results with it. So that for me, when I think about getting on stage, or doing something else and then I connect to that bigger vision, that vision is always going to pull me through any fear because it’s always going to be bigger than any fear.

That’s literally what I have on my screen-saver; we do all the screen-savers for the guys on the program, of ‘My mission is bigger than any fear.’ Any fear. And so by connecting with that, for you it might be something completely different, but I guarantee when it’s coming from that heart space it really pulls you towards it, then your mission is that greater thing that’s going to pull you, that’s going to bigger than any fear that you could ever experience. So really connect with the ‘why’ the reasons you’re doing it. For you it might be a personal reason, it might be that you’re doing it for your kids to show them what’s possible. Something that’s bigger than you.

And then it’s a case of trusting. Trusting that yes, you will be thrown challenges, you will be thrown judgements, it’s a fact. I’m not going to sit here and pretend it’s not going to sting when it does happen, but to know that that’s a challenge, that’s an opportunity for you to grow and that it doesn’t matter. Remember that whatever somebody perceives about you is just a reflection of their internal world. Has nothing to do with you. The way that I perceive the world is seen through my ‘Vicky lenses.’ The way that you perceive the world is seen through your lenses. It’s because your beliefs, it’s because of your values and possibly your limitations and my limitations as well. So to know that other people’s judgements are going to come, to know that your mission is way bigger than that and to know that when you’re connected to that mission it’s going to shrink your fear and up your inspiration, it’s a total game changer.

So the core principals, if you like, for today, self-validation is self-love lead to certainty, and your connection to something greater, the higher power; the universe, god, whatever it is, and your connection to your mission are going to absolute game changers. And bearing in mind that people’s judgement of you are only a reflection of themselves, yes they are going to come, be connected to you and they’re not going to knock you off course whatsoever.

I hope this has helped. As I said it’s a problem I come across again and again and again and it’s one of those things that we address fully, to really establish this principal throughout the Awakened Entrepreneur. The main focus in the beginning phase is your mindset because without that mindset in place, the strategies going to mean nothing. So we get you over those hurdles, that as I say, keeping coming up for all these women that I’m talking to – and then we allow your growth to grow the business as we go into the last stages of the program.

If you’re committed to growing your business and know that you need help to ensure that massive change happens this year, you still have a few weeks to join our next launch – which is almost full with absolutely extraordinary women. I would absolutely love you guys to pop your details in below and you’ll be directed to schedule in a call with me.  We’ll make sure we’re that right fit; understand your goals, understand whether I’m the one to help you, whether you are right for us and if so then we can talk about how it all works together.

Add your details in below to apply for your spot on the program and make this year phenomenal:

So, as I say, fear of judgement is holding way too many women back. You are way bigger than any judgement could ever be, your mission, your vision, your purpose, the fact that you’re here, it means that you’re here for a big reason. Don’t let any judgement slow you down. So I hope these principals have helped, let me know how you go applying them and I’d love to see you in next week’s blog.

In the meantime, live empowered and be inspired.