Are The People Around You Holding You Back?

Hey guys and a massive welcome to this week’s blog, I’m Vicky Murgatroyd from life empowerment project.

This week I want to talk to you about something that is brought up to me time and time again – that is people in your life and how a lot of them will look to hold you back one way or another whether it be conscience for them or unconscious it doesn’t matter.

But what do you do with those people in your life who are holding you back, who aren’t supporting you and who are making your journey to success that bit harder.

How to also transition out those people in your life to create space for those who are really going to make a difference in your journey, really support you and really raise your level of thinking as well.

What we’re going to discuss are the 4 D’s. 4 different types of people who you want in your life and who is time to get rid of.

So, we’re going to start right at the bottom of the pile are the Destructive people. These are typically what I get spoken to about often. Destructive people whether it be conscience or unconscious is irrelevant. They are pulling you down in some form or another.

They are either completely neglecting the fact to be involved in your business, asking about how you’re doing or even you personally (that level of care is completely non-existent) and actively pulling you down in some way.

Maybe they are pulling you off your journey, off your path or their behaviour is so destructive it entirely takes your focus off your business and from yourself and onto them.

It really depends whether they are friends, family or whatever – but the big key is with the destructive people you need to get rid of them.

It sounds really harsh (and I know how harsh it does sound) and I know how harsh it feels as you’re doing it – because I have done it. Honestly though, you become the people whom you spend the most time. You cannot afford if you are connected to your dream and you’re going to make this happen, you cannot afford to spend time with those destructive people.
The two cannot co-exist – it doesn’t work.

You either have destructive people in your life or you can create a rise quickly and create everything you want with your business. It really is one or the other.

When those destructive people are family what you want to do is approach the situation with absolute love and open heart firstly – and I know you will do that very easily because that is the space you live in most probably and as you do so just explain that you really want to spend time with them (you really want to give your energy to them) and you’re really keen to nurture the relationship and to allow it to grow.

However, in order for you to make this step up you’re going to have to create some space between that. You really want to spend time together and you love when you spend time together with them on “this basis” where things are positive and going well etc.

What you want to do is create a space for that to happen more often. That is the nicest and most loving way to cut that destructive time with family members.

Where it’s with friends – sorry it’s just time to go. If those people are destructive on that level, they are toxic in your life and there is no way around that or polite way – get rid of them.

They don’t deserve a place in your life.
Now to step back for a second you’re not making a judgement on who they are and saying that you’re better than them in any way shape or form (and that is what most people get hung up on) I certainly used to as well. The difference is you’re putting that respect back in yourself.

I deserve more than this and I will have more than this.

Remember – that when you fill a space that’s it, it’s filled.

If you’re filling your life with destructive people you’re not leaving room for those high-level thinkers that deeply care about you and your success in business and life.

There will be no room for those amazing people to come into your life – so those destructive people whether it be consciencsly or unconscienly – have to go. Create the space for the more supportive people to enter into your life and to completely change the game.

You deserve it and you know you do.

Number three of the four D’s is the “decent people”. These are the people that perhaps are not massively ambitious or looking to really improve their life in any way but they are decent. They are good people, that’s all there is to it. You can keep these people in your life but I will also say but you want to really be spending your time with the other two levels particularly the top level that we’re going to discuss in a moment.

The decent people are more than welcome to have a place in your life, they may not support you actively but they are good people so they are find to have around.


Number two of the four D’s are the “dreamers”. These people are ambitious in verbal world. They don’t however back it up with any actions. So, these people will talk a big game etc. They are great to be around, they lift our energy but in fact they’re not really following through and doing anything. So again, we can have them around in our life in minimal form but what you want to do is create a space for the top level – so the number one. Those people you really want to have around you in your life especially on your journey to success is the…


Those people who set a goal for themselves and then they go out and they fucking do it.
They act on it. They take the action. They face their fears. They make it happen.


Because you become the people with whom you spend the most time. Absolutely key. If you want to be as successful as I know many of you do, you’re going to have to put the work in. you’re going to have to put the action in.


You know what makes that a hell of a lot easier – when you surround by people who are putting the action in.

I have just come back off a retreat with my coaching group and those people are all doers (the people in the retreat).

Bear in mind that there are people even in those high-level groups who can’t quite push themselves to take the action (and there always will be) but you really want to be keying into those people who are doers.

Who just go out there and put the action in. Because let me tell you, when you’re around those people the BEST of you comes out.


It was always in there. The best of you is always in there but if you’re going to spend time with those destructive people the best of you will just get buried just like it is within them.


When you’re spending time with the doers, you’re taking the action, you get the confidence momentum going and that makes all the difference to your journey. It’s going to make 2017 spectacular and unforgettable.


So, you have your four levels.

  • Destructive (time to go)
  • Decent (minimal time)
  • Dreamers (minimal time)
  • Doers (the people you should be spending the most time with).


You will become more of an action taker, more of a result producer when you’re spending time with those doers.


Be sure to also see what role you’re fulfilling in your groups. Are you just a dreamer or are you a doer? Really look to raise your standard because when you do and commit to that you are going to attract those people who fulfil that as well.


So, as I’ve said all the way through you become the people with who you spend the most time. You want to be extraordinary – hang around with extraordinary people. You want to be a billionaire, hang around with billionaires.


It makes all the difference with who you are spending your time with. Not only on our emotional scale but also how that affects you vibrationally and who you’re going to attract into your life, what you’re going to attract and the level on which you’re thinking.
It’s going to be far easier to do it when you’re around people who naturally raise you up rather than being around people who naturally drag you down.
So, remember, find the doers, connect with them, be the example for you and your group of friends as well and connect with those people who are on that higher level doing the things that you want to do.


It will make all the difference.


I hope you got some massive value out today guys. Remember the key message that I want you take away from today is you putting value on you is what is going to make the biggest difference. When you value you, you will naturally not spend your time with those lower level thinkers. You will naturally raise that up and is going to make the game even easier for you.


Please share this video. The lessons that I share with you guys have absolutely changed my life in unimaginable ways and I love to share that message with my clients, you guys and I would love to continue that ripple effect so share as wide as you can.


I will see you on next week’s blog and in the meantime live empowered and be inspired.





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